Archive for November, 2007

A Great Thanksgiving!

{ November 26, 2007 @ 9:39 am } · { Uncategorized }
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We had a great holiday!  It is great just for us to get out of town.  Leah is feeling well most of the time and the babies seem to be growing at rapid pace.  We only have 13 weeks left before we meet these two guys.

We went to Leah’s grandparents in Ft. Worth.  It was great to see her grandparents, parent, and family from Illinois.  However, after making my phone calls on Thanksgiving to my own family I really missed them and it seemed bittersweet!  There is a slimmer chance that we will travel during Christmas time.  However, if anything were to happen they would send us to Ft. Worth, so that is the only travel destination that will happen in December.

I ate way too much and enjoyed every bite.  The food was fantastic and I finally got a slice of pumpkin pie.

It snowed the last two days we were there and it was really pretty to see big flakes coming down.  Luckily it melted before we returned so our trip was safe coming back.

I have written another piece on prejudice, but am in inner turmoil on whether or not to share it.  I have sent it to a friend of mine who teaches in the English Dept. here at ACU.  He and I had a long conversation the other day about it and then I wrote the piece.  Now I just want to hear his feedback.  That is why that conversation has stalled for the moment.

Another bit of news:  Mike has asked some people to teach some Wednesday night classes here at Highland in the Spring.  I will be teaching on Children of Divorce.  I plan to use my own experiences and a book about just that, that I read recently.  It’s too early to tell what that class will look like, but I hope it is a safe place for questions and healing. 

-Mercer

Second Class Christian

{ November 8, 2007 @ 11:07 am } · { Blogroll }
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Many people know that when I was five my parents divorced.  My older brother was seven.  We were the ideal nuclear family except for having a sister.  Dad worked hard (blue collar) and mom stayed at home with us and worked with day care organizations.  My dad was heavily involved in our church (leading singing, leading a young couples class, etc.).  On the outside we were the perfect family.  In 1982 that all changed.  Dad left was married six months later and mom was left with a house, two boys, a car, and no job.  We made it through the help of the church, grandparents, and other Christians that gave freely to us.

However, something weird happens to your family in the faith context when divorce happens.  Or maybe I should say that in our church context and many of the church contexts of that time were this way.  In that context women were “silent” in the church and their voice was mainly heard through their husband.  Church programs were directed basically only to nuclear families.

So when their was no husband and no nuclear family and it was all rattled by adultery, divorce, and dad’s dis-fellowship we essentially became second class at church.  It was innocent enough, but mom’s voice couldn’t be heard as well, my brother and I missed at least every other Sunday visiting dad.  I can’t say for sure that the church made us feel second class, but I can say for sure that it was a real feeling we had.

School wasn’t much different.  There were only a handful of us who had divorced parents and it was obvious we were different.  For some reason because our parents ended up divorcing their marriage we were divorced from mainstream community.

There was a prejudice in this and I felt it every day of my life.  As time went on, divorce became more popular.  That idea of second class blurred but didn’t go away.  I still live with that feeling and is probably why I talk about this part of my life so much.  Prejudice happens when there are differences.  It becomes lethal when people use it to better themselves over another person.

The divorce of my parents and the prejudice that came with that changed my life, however, what I have learned that the divorce of my parents and the prejudice against me does not define my life.

A Reminder in Class

{ November 1, 2007 @ 11:25 am } · { Uncategorized }
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Last Sunday one of our students asked Gary Varner to guest speak for the high school class.  The students are owning class and are organizing each week.  Gary was asked to give a dramatic presentation on the story from John of the Samaritan Woman at the Well.  Gary read the story and was touched by the prejudice that existed there.  He spoke from his heart (instead of the dramatic presentation) about the prejudice he had growing up and how that and outright bigotry is crippling our lives in Christ not to mention our society.  He told a story of a boy from his hometown in Oklahoma and how he was different, not racially, but financially and left us with the thought I wonder how he’s doing today and if he could have done more for him then.

Prejudice creeps up in our lives daily.  Sometimes, racially, financially, or even religiously.  Sometimes prejudice creeps up and then holds residence within our bodies.  We easily embrace it and choose to accept it.  We then can become bigots and social terrorists.

What do I know about prejudice.  I’m a white male where I should dominate in almost any setting.  I know a little on my own level.  Not to the extent were I was physically abused or persecuted, but enough to be scarred emotionally and react with my own prejudices and indictments.

If you want to know more about racial tensions you should read my friend, Sean Palmer’s blog at www.seanpalmer.wordpress.com

In my next few posts I want to talk about my struggle with being prejudged, stereotyped, and my confession of prejudging others as well.  Stay with me and let’s discuss, feel, and heal together.